This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
