If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
