Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
