Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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