I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
