i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
