All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
