Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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