somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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