I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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