In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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