My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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