well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
