well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
