I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
