i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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