My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
