I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
