on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
