I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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