i just wanna soil my oats bro
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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