When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
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