This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
