On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
