My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Say something about gay babies.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
