Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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