We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Randomize
