dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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