these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
They are going to name an STD after you.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
