ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
