Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
