she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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