loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
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