he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
