My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
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