Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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