with your own penis?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
