carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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