The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
