I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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