My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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