It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
