I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
