I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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