So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
