It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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