at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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