We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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