never play flip cup with pint glasses
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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