How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
You left your phone here
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