What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize